FLOURISH & BLOTTING

beauty, travel & lifestyle

22 Oct 2015

You Need To Be More Like Her

Me on top of the Empire State Building
Other people's expectations, we have all been at the receiving end of them at some point in our lives, and if not, you luckily have them to look forward to. I think now at 30, I am susceptible to them more then ever, but I would like to think I am becoming more adept at managing them. I mean, who hasn't heard 'So and so is on their second child...so, are kids on your agenda?' Roughly translated to 'Gosh! Are you ever going to settle down, and WHEN?'

And this example is only mild in comparison to what I have received in the last few years. I have had someone suggest life coaching just because I was unmarried at 27, without child, and was undecided on a career path. Thing is, everyone is different. If I was to turn it around, I could say, 'How archaic! 2.4 children is so 90's. And not to be a cynic, but have you seen the divorce statistics recently?'  - I would never say that by the way!

Anyway, making these kind of judgements (which is passed off as 'advice') can really hurt a persons' feelings, but what is strange is these people actually believe they are helping? Crazy! By the way, in my opinion, I am really not that bad off. I live in a lovely house, I've got a job, a long term boyfriend and a very precious furbaby. So, whenever I'm in these predicaments I always like to recall the saying 'Different strokes for different folks.' My thoughts on careers can be read about here.

I love my holidays and my handbags. Is it so bad that people have different priorities, and things that make them happy? And can these people on their 3rd or 4th little monster say they are completely happy? Can they say they haven't once dreamed of just coming in from work, pouring themselves a glass of wine, turning up Jay-Z to the max and relaxing in a perfectly ordered household? Or go out for a spur of the moment meal, or even a holiday?! I sometimes think 'Last Minute City Break' should be my middle name!

And just for your information, I don't want anyone to think I am against marriage, babies or the 'traditional' lifestyle. I would like both, but in my own time. There is no rush, yet! And if you had asked me a few years ago I would have point blank dismissed the whole idea with a disgusted look on my face. So you see, that's progress! Everyone matures at different paces, and desires develop with this. I mean, I still have to learn how to ski and I want to go on a horse riding mini break, amongst other things, before I settle down.

I guess what I am trying to say is that I will not judge anyone who makes different life choices to my own. Another well known saying is 'Each to their own'. So long as you are happy, then that's what is important, right? And if you aren't completely enamoured with your path, change it! Do it subtly, or go all out.  Surround yourself with people who support you. But never allow anyone to make you think just because you have made different choices than them, that you are wrong, and they know best, because more than likely, they are just talking bubbles.

Love, Jo.



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1 comment

  1. Ugh I totally agree...there's always so much pressure related to one's age. Like you can never be old or young enough to be left alone to live your life they way you want to. It's hard not to let the comments get to you, but as you say, everyone has to do it at their own pace and in their own way

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